Dear Booger

By

Zuke

Review by Angel(not-so-nice)Rad

 

 

 

Next Birthday or Christmas or Groundhogís Day Iím telling all my siblings that the gift to give me is a trip to Hawaii.Iím underlining it six times on my list.Iíve dropped hints the size of boulders.†† Iíve shown up at family reunions in a grass skirt.Hey, Iíll even sit on the mall Santaís urine-saturated lap (and risk ruining my favorite leather pants) if it will help my chances of getting leiíd.

 

Seriously, Iíve never been to Hawaii.I hate saying Iíve never done something.

 

And what is the likelihood Iíll find reservations and plane tickets in my stocking?About even with the odds that Madonna will knock on my front door next week and announce sheís ditching Rocco and the kids for me.Sad, but irrefutably true.

 

But a girl can dream...

 

I can even imagine what might happen on my subtropical sojourn...

 

... it involves Madonna and copious amounts of poi...

 

Or, I could give my overtired imagination a rest and just read Zukeís little masterpiece... a very enjoyable substitute for the real thing.

 

But mídears, I must add a few cautionary words:

 

Donít read this if youíre looking for smoldery, cynical, sexy ex-drug lords or secret agents.There are no leather-wearing, Smith & Wesson toting detectives with bruised souls and secret pasts.

 

It just ainít happening in this one... thank goodness... itís just a humorous tale about a generous brother and a dream vacation with a few snags (in the form of an icy, green-eyed blonde with attitude) thrown in for dramatic effect.

 

What you will find in this story is that you are laughing one moment and wishing the author would write a sequel in the next.

 

So, okay, thatíll be #2 on my wish listóA sequel to Dear Booger...

 

Go read it... youíll be dreaming of sequels instead of sugarplums... I just know it...

 

And listen... if you see that parsimonious little sister of mine, you might mention, just in passing, that a sweater from the Gap is nice and all, but a cottage on a beach in Maui just might keep me from describing to mom, in vivid detail, exactly how that big dent in the rear of her Mercedes just miraculously *appeared * one night...

 

no threats... thatís all Iím saying...

 

 

Dear Booger